Should I stay or should I go?

When Mr. Ex moved out I chose not to put the house on the market. Well, I chose not to, but I didn’t really have a choice. It was September, which, as a teacher, would have been torture. I can’t even imagine getting ready to sell a house at the beginning of the school year. My younger daughter had just started a new job which was literally a five-minute drive, and there was the little matter of a totally tanked economy with which to deal.

The other issue – not a small one, either – was the myriad projects to which Mr. Ex had committed. At the time I didn’t have a bedroom floor (seriously; I had pulled up the nasty carpet in preparation for Mr. Ex to put down a laminate floor, and it had been several weeks), several rooms don’t have floor molding (carpet came up, laminate went down), several ceilings have damage from when our roof leaked, and there are a couple doors that don’t have molding around them (we replaced all our doors with oak two years ago but Mr. Ex hadn’t put up all the molding). The garage and garden shed were also packed full – full – full.

So I say that I chose not to put the house up for sale, but I didn’t really have a choice. Mr. Ex likes to say that it was my choice, but I disagree.

Anyway, the decision has reared its ugly head once again. It’s summer, so I’m off, Ms. Youngest is leaving for Israel in 10 days (oh my) and the economy isn’t quite in the toilet any more.

So . . . do I stay or do I go?

I would love to sell the house and buy something a little smaller closer to Ms. Eldest and her husband. It wouldn’t be any further from work than I am now, I’d be much closer to the highway (not as big of a deal since my mother has passed, but nice nonetheless), I could be saving money over what I’m paying now, and a fresh start would be nice.

On the other hand, it would be a pain. All those projects Mr. Ex promised . . . not exactly done. Not hardly. I still have the damaged ceilings, the garage still has a lot of crap in it, the shed is still full, and the molding is still missing from one room. The economy hasn’t bounced back to the point where I would actually make any money from selling the house and I would be lucky to break even (which would mean that I would have to use my modest inheritance from my mother in order to purchase anything new).

If I stay I would have to continue to streamline, purge, and make changes to make the house “mine.”

So . . . do I stay or do I go?



Filed under Creating a new life, Haven for one, Moving on, Transition

3 responses to “Should I stay or should I go?

  1. montrealbabe

    Give it a year before making a decision – advice I was given and did not follow – to my detriment

  2. So, I hear two perspectives: Stay or Go. What are some other perspectives? Don’t overthink it – just let the possibility of other perspectives come to you! What are the dogs’ perspectives? What would your perspective be if you were yourself 10 years from now? What’s the perspective from “shalom bayit”? And the list goes on…

    And BTW, this blog is a model for how I’d like my blog to be! What a gifted, intelligent and humanizing voice you bring to the blogosphere. Kudos!


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